Remembrance Series: Part I – The Rose, the Dream, and the Doorway

A pilgrimage of memory, medicine and mystery…

The Words That Made My Bones Vibrate

I was in the middle of a 1:1 Akashic Reading when my client—who also happened to be one of the few souls whose podcast deeply resonated with me at the very beginning of my awakening—paused, her voice soft but certain.

Her voice had been a thread I followed through the fog in those early days, when I was still trying to discern what was real, what was resonance, and what was fear. She helped me bridge the unknown. She was a lighthouse in the foggy in-between.

And now, there she was, speaking to me through the screen, with the kind of certainty that makes your bones remember. 

“You know you’re part of the Order of the Rose, right?”

I blinked. “What’s that?”

“You don’t know?” she smiled gently, and gave me a brief explanation. But that moment wasn’t informative—it was catalytic. 

Her words stirred something ancient in me. Like a bell that only I could hear. A code clicking back into place.

That was a couple of months ago.
And now, here I am—unraveling, remembering, recording.

Order of the Rose.

Those words lit a fire in me. And that fire lit what I thought was a new path. But it wasn’t new. It had always been beneath my feet, woven into my breath, hidden in plain sight. I just hadn’t named it, until now. 

And soon you’ll understand why.

So I walked down the path.

Discovering the Order of the Rose

This remembrance journey begins back in October 2021, the month of my awakening. At the time, I was preparing for a move back to Denver from St. Louis. The official relocation wouldn’t be until January 2022, but the soul migration had already begun.

I didn’t realize how disembodied I was back then. I was mind-heavy, spiritually starved, still very much inside the matrix.

Back in Denver, I began working with a therapist—I’ll call her Miranda. She was half clinical, half mystical. One hand in the practical, one hand in the ether. She did Reiki, somatic work, and held space in a way that helped me feel safe enough to begin asking bigger questions. One of those questions was about plant medicine.

**All names used from this point forward have been changed to honor the privacy of those involved.**

I told her during a session: “I feel like I need to work with the medicine. Something is calling me. I don’t go deep in my meditations—I feel like I need help peeling back the layers.”

She just looked at me and said, wide-eyed, “Did you really just ask me that?”

For a split second I thought I had said something wrong.

She shook her head, “No—it’s just wild. I was literally typing in our private Facebook group asking about any upcoming medicine ceremonies in the area. As you spoke, my hands were typing.”

A Prophetic Dream Leads to Plant Medicine

That night, I had a dream.

In it, I was working at McDonald’s, and my manager’s name was Emily. (I actually did have a manager named Emily, at one point, but it wasn’t at McDonald’s…)

I kept calling out her name: “Emily… Emily!” Over and over again, like I needed her.
I also held a baby girl in my arms with piercing green eyes. She wasn’t mine, but I loved her instantly.

The next morning—Wednesday—I checked my email. And there it was.
An introduction email from Miranda… to a woman named… EMILY! My jaw was on the floor!

Emily was the one hosting the upcoming plant medicine ceremony. I was stunned. And when I clicked her website?
The medicine she worked with was Tepezcohuite, grandfather tree medicine—the exact medicine I had tried to sit with on an earlier trip to Tulum.

Let me pause here.

Back in September 2022, I had traveled to Tulum. I met a local man who asked me, “Have you ever communed with Tepezcohuite?”

I hadn’t even heard of it before. I was looking for ayahuasca at the time.
He told me about this tree medicine, how powerful it was, and said he’d check if the shaman was available.

He later told me, that the shaman was in Mérida holding a ceremony.
I didn’t chase it. No worries. If it wasn’t meant to be, I wasn’t going to force it.

Turns out it was, just not yet…

The Rose Inside the Pyramid— My Sacred Sigil

Flash forward to January 2023.
I dreamed the name Emily.
I woke up to an email from someone named Emily.
And she worked with the exact medicine I tried to find in Mexico.

The medicine found me.

We had our discovery call—what was meant to be 20 minutes turned into a soul-deep hour. And when I finally saw her in person, I realized why she looked so familiar.

She had the same green eyes as the baby girl in my dream.
The threads were undeniable now.

The February ceremony was my first. The visuals, the giggles, the revelation—it was all new to me. But the way Emily held space… sacred, clean, loving… I knew I wanted to keep working with her.

So I booked a 1:1 energy healing session.

When I arrived, she said she felt called to do something different than what was originally booked.
I agreed and laid on the table.

We called in the Divine Feminine. And when she asked me, “Who is here?”

I said: “Goddess Isis and Mary Magdalene.”

Mary Magdalene and the Divine Feminine

At that point in my journey, I was more familiar with Goddess Isis. I had called upon her before, danced with her in meditations, felt her regal presence in the quiet. Egyptian mythology had always pulled at something in me I couldn’t name. So when she arrived in that session, I recognized her immediately.

But Mary Magdalene…she was new to me. At least, on a conscious level.

I grew up Catholic. I’d heard heard her name in passing—always paired with shame, with sin, with redemption through a man. That version of her never stuck. I never really knew her. Not in my mind.

But in that moment, her energy came through like warm honey and rose petals. My soul recognized her. Even if my mind hadn’t caught up yet.

Emily then said, “Ask them for your power tools. Sacred objects to help you remember who you are.”

So I did. And I was shown a vision.
A pink rose inside a glowing pyramid of iridescent light.

A symbol. A sigil. A seal.

I spent months searching for a physical version of that symbol—earrings, pendants, anything.

I couldn’t find it. So I let it be.

Divinely Inked—A Portal in the Skin

Until July 17, 2023, in Gili Air, a small, beautiful island in Indonesia.

I was fresh out of my 200-hour yoga teacher training. A new sister from the program invited me to her tattoo session with a bamboo tattoo artist.

I was drawn to his energy. I told him about my vision: the rose and the pyramid. 

He drew it exactly as I saw it in my mind’s eye. 
That was my first tattoo.
But more than that—it was a ritual, a rite of passage.

Tattoos, to me, are portals. They hold memories.
And this one? It sealed my vow.

This wasn’t just a plant medicine story.
This was an initiation. Part two comes soon. Stay close.

With Love and Gratitude,
Dulce Olivia🌹

Originally posted on my Substack on 01 June 2025

Healing at the Quantum Level: Bridging Quantum Healing and the Felt Sense

I love creating avenues for healing and expansion. Actually, I sometimes wish we’d stop calling it healing. I think I will.

I call it liberation.

Those parts of ourselves aren’t broken—they’re trapped. If you remove the one variable (a person, a situation, or a belief), what remains is wholeness. It’s not about healing. It’s about liberating the parts of ourselves that have been held hostage, whether by fear, shame, conditioning, or survival strategies.

We are both the prisoner and the jailer. And we’re holding the key to an already unlocked cell door.

The prison is perceptual.

Liberation is about traveling into those dungeons within our sacred temples and being present with those exiled parts of ourselves. Because they’re always telling the same story. It just surfaces through different, often repetitive, self-sabotaging or hindering patterns.

And all they truly need is to be listened to.

That part of you that was abused, abandoned, silenced… doesn’t need to be “fixed.”. It needs you to be with it. To show it, through your presence, that it is finally safe.

And in that safety, liberation begins.

Trauma As Energy

Trauma is energy – a whiplash of life force that never fully discharged from the body. Instead, it stays trapped in the body, looping over and over.

The more time you spend in your body, which is synonymous with presence, the more it speaks to you. 
And the more you listen, the more fluent you become. That’s when trust begins to form between you and your vessel.

This isn’t always easy, especially with deep-seated wounds we may not even consciously remember. The body is brilliant. It buries what would otherwise overwhelm us, because its job is to preserve the organism.

But eventually, for us to thrive, not just survive, we must return.

You won’t necessarily find it gets “easier.” You will simply grow more compassionate. You capacity to love will expand. And that is what makes it feel easier.

Safety in the Healing Space

When I sense a client is nervous before a session, I always:

Your body, your Records, and the medicine (if we are working with plant spirits) will never show you something you are not ready for.

You may be broken open, but only to expand. Not broken beyond repair.

So if what arises is shocking to your system, trust that it is because you are ready. Ready to process. Ready to release. Ready to close the loop.
That movement of energy is just one step towards your liberation. A shift that already occurred—on a soul level… on a quantum level. 

Your body is simply catching up.

Presence as Integration

Think about it… how many times have you gotten into your car, and the next thing you knew, you were already at your destination? You were on autopilot. Your body arrived, but your awareness wasn’t present.

That is how intelligent the body is.

But here is the truth: your body can survive without You, but it cannot thrive without You.
By “You,” I mean your I AM presence.

And yes—communing with spirit guides, remote traveling, swimming through the etheric-blue waters of Mintaka is beautiful.

But if we don’t anchor those teachings into the body…we are just floating.

Take the cosmic medicine and infuse it into your cells. Impart the soul’s wisdom to the body.

Upgrade the hardware to process the new software.

This is where neurobiology comes in.

The Felt Sense and the Nervous System

Upgrading the hardware requires one to engage the felt sense. Why? Because trauma dysregulates the nervous system, and our nervous system governs everything. It’s not just about stress.

Your nervous system affects:

–Skin health

–Digestion

–Hormones

–Muscle function

–Energy levels

–Capacity for joy and peace. 

Example: 
When the body is under chronic stress, it activates the HPA axis—a hormonal feedback loop that increases cortisol. Elevated cortisol over time leads to inflammation, which affects everything from skin flare-ups to fatigue.

Digestion is deeply tied to the vagus nerve, which connects the brain and gut. Dysregulation can cause bloating, food sensitivities, or IBS-like symptoms.

—I struggled with digestion issues from my late teens into very recent years. I saw so many different types of doctors throughout the years, and none had any idea why it was happening. It wasn’t until I started practicing energy work, which led me to somatic work, that I was able to regulate my digestion. 

The nervous system impacts your limbic system—the emotional brain. So you can bet that a dysregulated nervous system will impact the ability to regulate emotions, feel safe in your body, and experience pleasure or peace. And isn’t this what the human experience is about? To FEEL?

Practices to Engage the Felt Sense

Modalities like breath work, EFT tapping, mindful movement (Yoga, dance, Tai Chi, to name a few), and vagal stimulation retrain the nervous system.

These practices:

–Build safety into the body

–Signal that you are no longer in danger

–Allow the body to thrive rather than just survive

It’s giving the body to finally exhale.

These are practices that bridge biology and spirit. 
These tools return us to the body, so the body can remember it is safe to receive love and expand. 

These are just a few modalities among many. Find one that speaks to you, and devote time and energy to do it. I promise you, you will FEEL the knots untying.

At first, it may might feel uncomfortable because you are disrupting the very loop that’s kept you “safe.”
But soon your body will begin to recognize the release as a treat, not a threat.

It becomes as simple as pouring water into a parched mouth. Your body will want it. Because it now knows that there is a release, and exhale on the other side.

Fill your body with the same ethereal waters you bathe in when you meditate
Your soul chose to be human.
So come home.

Make your body your sanctuary, your oasis, your playground.

This was always the point.

A Note on Safety and Support

***If engaging the felt sense feels intense, redirect your awareness to something pleasant—a comforting memory, a soft texture, a safe sound. 
Go slow. You don’t have to do it all at once. And you don’t have to do it alone.

There are practicioners who are trained to walk with you through these tender thresholds. I’ve leaned on support when certain practices became too intense to process alone, and now I hold that kind of space for others, too.

If your body says yes, you will know when the time is right.

Book a 1:1 Somatic + Akashic Healing Session with Me:

Disclaimer: I am not a medical provider. I am a registered Trauma-Informed Yoga teacher and an Akashic Records Channel. What I share comes from the Akashic Records, years of study, and lived experience – both in my own journey and in client work.

This is not medical advice, but soul medicine rooted in embodied experience.
Take what resonates, leave the rest, and trust your inner guidance above all.

A few reads that have inspired the knowledge shared in this article:

The Myth of Normal — Dr. Gabor Maté
The Body Keeps the Score — Dr. Bessel van der Kolk
Anchored: How to Befriend Your Nervous System — Deb Dana, LCSW

Originally posted on my Substack on July 15, 2025

You Went Through a Dark Night of the Soul, but You Have a Teams Meeting at 10 A.M. the Next Day

One moment, I’m meditating and feeling serpents rise up my spine—my first taste of kundalini awakening—and jolting awake to a kaleidoscope of faces in the mirror, some kind, others terrifying. The next, I’m logging into a Teams meeting at 10 a.m., pretending I’m not questioning the very fabric of reality.

That’s the thing about a spiritual awakening: it doesn’t wait for you to clear your calendar.

This space—Sacred Balance Collective—is for the souls navigating their own unraveling. The ones wondering if they’re losing their minds, only to find themselves. If you’ve ever felt like the ground beneath you has crumbled, leaving you questioning everything, you’re not alone.

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The Breakup That Broke Me Open

October of 2021 turned my life upside down. At the time, I was dating someone, and though our connection was brief, it shook me to my core. He brought with him a feeling I had never experienced before—a remembrance, as if some ancient thread of energy between us had been reignited.

When it ended as quickly as it began, I was devastated. It wasn’t just heartbreak—it was a spiritual initiation. It felt as though my first glimpse of divinity had been ripped from my hands, leaving me shattered.

It broke me open.

I realized I wasn’t just uncomfortable with myself—I was deeply unhappy, unsettled, and ill-at-ease in my own skin. Everything felt like it was unraveling, and I couldn’t hold on to anything familiar because none of it was truly me. This was the beginning of my spiritual transformation, though I didn’t know it at the time.

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A Dark Night of the Soul

Caught Between Worlds

Then came the sleepless nights. A constant buzzing in my ears. Flashes of light behind my closed eyes. And most unsettling of all—voices. I would hear my name being called—not inside my mind, but outside of it, like a whisper just out of reach.

At first, I thought I was losing my grip on reality. But no. This was my first spiritual awakening. The veil between worlds had begun to thin, and my soul was stirring, waking itself up.

TikTok became an unlikely lifeline. My feed overflowed with terms like dark night of the soul, spiritual awakening symptoms, and kundalini rising. Every video felt like it was speaking directly to me. I hadn’t searched for these things, and yet there they were. It wasn’t just the algorithm; it felt like divine intervention.

Or maybe Big Brother. Good-looking-out, FBI agent assigned to me. (I kid. Maybe.)

I dove headfirst into the spiritual rabbit hole, desperate to understand why I felt so lost, yet so alive. TikTok said, Meditate. Connect with your spirit team. I didn’t even know what a spirit team was, but I followed the breadcrumbs.

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The Serpent in the Mirror

One day, I sat in front of a mirror doing a chakra alignment meditation (because apparently, we have energy centers within our bodies. Who knew?) As I focused on the energy within, I saw something extraordinary—a serpent at the base of my spine, coiling and circling, moving upward through each chakra.

My body began to gyrate uncontrollably, and as the serpent reached my crown chakra, I opened my eyes, startled.

In the mirror, my reflection shifted and morphed. My face became a cascade of different faces—some kind, others terrifying. I stared as the last face, dark and demonic, stared back at me. I had no idea what I had just unlocked.

Later, I would learn this was my first kundalini awakening. It terrified and fascinated me. I knew I needed help. I was way out of my depth.

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Reiki, Ancestral Healing, and the Unveiling of Memories

I remembered a TikTok video offering distance Reiki healing. The woman on the screen said, I will send you chakra healing energy. Say yes to receive. Skeptical but desperate, I said yes. And then it happened—warmth poured into my chest, like hot tea filling an empty cup. My heart expanded, my head buzzed, and I couldn’t deny it: this was real.

That experience led me to a local Reiki practitioner who became my guide. Her sessions were transformative. She told me about the spirit guides who had been with me since birth and encouraged me to call on my ancestors, who had been waiting for me to step into my role as a healer.

I couldn’t deny her words—she would repeat or confirm messages I’d received in meditation but hadn’t shared with her. Through Reiki, I began moving stagnant energy, and memories began to resurface—light, dark, shadow, and divine. Ancient and recent. Childhood trauma rose to the surface, demanding to be seen, healed, transmuted, and integrated through ancestral healing practices

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The Akashic Records and a New Dimension

The uncovering of my trauma led me to the Akashic Records, opening a dimension I didn’t know existed. At first, they didn’t give me the answers I wanted about my pain. But now, years later, I understand—they gave me what I was ready to receive. Over time, the Records became my most powerful tool for self-discovery and soul remembrance. Eventually, I became certified to read them for others.

Much later in my journey, I asked the Records about that man I told you about—the one who turned my world upside down.

The Records revealed a soul contract—an agreement we’d made before this lifetime. He came to remind me of the divinity within me, and then he was meant to leave. He was my gentle alarm clock, sent to jolt me awake and move on.

When I think back now, I see how tender it all was. He was kind. Never mean, never cruel. It just ended. And I marvel at the gentleness of it all. I feel grateful for how softly my soul whispered, Wake up.

The pain I felt after it ended wasn’t necessarily about him. It was a yearning. I ached for the light I saw reflected in him, not realizing at the time that the light was already within me. He was a mirror, reflecting what I was blind to until I could finally see it for myself. Once I recognized it, his role in my life was complete.

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Welcome to the Journey

Through this journey, I’ve learned that spiritual awakening isn’t about becoming something new. It’s about peeling back the layers and remembering who you’ve always been. It’s messy, terrifying, and sometimes absurd—like going through a dark night of the soul and still having to log into a Teams meeting the next morning.

But that’s the beauty of it.

This journey woke me up. But more importantly, it brought me home to myself. It’s still bringing me home. This is a lifelong process, but what it’s taught me so far is that the spiritual path isn’t about escaping life. It’s about embracing all of it—the joy, the pain, the light, and the shadow.

This space is where I’ll share my journey—raw, unfiltered, and unapologetic. If you’re navigating your own dark night of the soul, wondering if you’ve lost your mind, I’m here to tell you: yes, you are, but only to rediscover the part of you that has always been there—your true essence—who you were before you were told who you had to be.

Welcome home, sweet soul.

With love & gratitude,

Dulce Olivia

Founder of Sacred Balance Collective—guiding spiritual awakenings, kundalini journeys, and Akashic Records embodiment work.

Originally posted on my Substack on 27 January 2025